http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/-t1.htm Something tickle your funnybone? Share it with others. Sat, 13 Dec 2008 00:03:52 GMT 10 http://i18.servimg.com/u/f18/11/65/21/31/banner10.jpg http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/-t1.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-auto-industry-bailout-explained-t15839.htm Outspoken No more need to wonder how they got where they are. They just had the wrong accountants. The Laugh Box Sat, 13 Dec 2008 00:03:52 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-auto-industry-bailout-explained-t15839.htm#18698 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-auto-industry-bailout-explained-t15839.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/i-think-i-ve-found-my-new-doctor-t15804.htm Outspoken A friend told me I should go to his see his Doctor and that I would like him. I asked a few questions to see where he stood on some of my issues. Here's how the interview went. Q: I've heard that cardio-vascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true? A: Your heart is only good for so many beats, and that's it... don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car ... The Laugh Box Fri, 12 Dec 2008 02:31:40 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/i-think-i-ve-found-my-new-doctor-t15804.htm#18660 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/i-think-i-ve-found-my-new-doctor-t15804.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/some-thanksgiving-humour-t15188.htm Outspoken The Parrot... A woman recently received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. She tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else she could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary. Finally, she was fed up and yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. She shook the parrot and ... The Laugh Box Sat, 22 Nov 2008 18:47:43 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/some-thanksgiving-humour-t15188.htm#17954 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/some-thanksgiving-humour-t15188.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/a-legal-question-t14006.htm Outspoken Is this "statutory" rape??? The Laugh Box Sun, 19 Oct 2008 02:22:33 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/a-legal-question-t14006.htm#16599 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/a-legal-question-t14006.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/it-s-such-a-drag-getting-old-t10650.htm Outspoken GAMES FOR WHEN WE ARE OLDER 1. Sag, you're It. 2. Hide and go pee. 3. 20 questions shouted into your good ear. 4. Kick the bucket. 5. Red Rover, Red Rover, the nurse says Bend Over. 6. Musical recliners. 7. Simon says something incoherent. 8. Pin the Toupee on the bald guy SIGNS OF MENOPAUSE: 1. You sell your home heating system at a yard sale. 2. You have to write post-it notes with your kids' names on them. 3. You change your underwear after ... The Laugh Box Thu, 10 Jul 2008 01:29:16 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/it-s-such-a-drag-getting-old-t10650.htm#12813 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/it-s-such-a-drag-getting-old-t10650.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/garden-snakes-can-be-dangerous-t10573.htm Outspoken GARDEN SNAKES CAN BE DANGEROUS... Garden Grass Snakes also known as Garter Snakes (Thamnophissirtalis) can be dangerous. Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes. Here's why. A couple in Sweetwater, Texas, had a lot of potted plants. During a recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze. It turned out that a little green garden grass snake was hidden in one of the plants. When it had warmed up, it slithered out and the wife ... The Laugh Box Mon, 07 Jul 2008 12:58:00 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/garden-snakes-can-be-dangerous-t10573.htm#12727 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/garden-snakes-can-be-dangerous-t10573.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/why-women-should-not-take-men-shopping-against-their-will-t10454.htm Outspoken This is why women should not take men shopping against their will. After Mr. and Mrs. Fenton retired, Mrs. Fenton insisted her husband accompany her on her trips to Wal-Mart. Unfortunately, Mr. Fenton was like most men -- he found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate was the fact that Mrs. Fenton, like most women, loved to browse. One day Mrs. Fenton received the following letter from her local Wal-Mart. Dear Mrs. Fenton, Over ... The Laugh Box Thu, 03 Jul 2008 17:07:15 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/why-women-should-not-take-men-shopping-against-their-will-t10454.htm#12585 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/why-women-should-not-take-men-shopping-against-their-will-t10454.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-truth-and-nothing-but-the-truth-t5935.htm Outspoken The truth and nothing but the truth... Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?" She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment ... The Laugh Box Sun, 23 Mar 2008 15:54:35 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-truth-and-nothing-but-the-truth-t5935.htm#7568 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-truth-and-nothing-but-the-truth-t5935.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/easter-yokes-t5907.htm Outspoken Some Easter "Yokes". The Laugh Box Sun, 23 Mar 2008 01:20:19 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/easter-yokes-t5907.htm#7531 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/easter-yokes-t5907.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-giraffe-test-t5752.htm Outspoken Take the test but think it through before answering. See how you do. The answers are in the next post down. No cheating now. There's only four questions and a little surprise at the end of the answers. 1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? 3. The Lion King is hosting an Animal Conference. All the animals attend...except one. Which animal does not attend? 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by ... The Laugh Box Tue, 18 Mar 2008 23:20:05 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-giraffe-test-t5752.htm#7356 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-giraffe-test-t5752.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/ups-airlines-t5349.htm Outspoken Just in case you need a laugh: Remember it takes a college degree to fly a plane, but only a high school diploma to fix one; a reassurance to those of us who fly routinely in our jobs. After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a 'Gripe Sheet,' which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews ... The Laugh Box Sat, 08 Mar 2008 16:45:59 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/ups-airlines-t5349.htm#6907 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/ups-airlines-t5349.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/what-is-a-710-t4904.htm Outspoken What is a 710? A few days ago I was having some work done at my local garage. A blonde came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten. We all looked at each other and another customer asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?" She replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one.." She replied that she did not know exactly what it was, but this piece had always been there. The mechanic gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked ... The Laugh Box Thu, 28 Feb 2008 02:57:36 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/what-is-a-710-t4904.htm#6409 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/what-is-a-710-t4904.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/why-dogs-bite-people-t4862.htm Outspoken I'd bite them, too!! Some people should be mauled!! The Laugh Box Wed, 27 Feb 2008 02:58:09 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/why-dogs-bite-people-t4862.htm#6366 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/why-dogs-bite-people-t4862.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/you-might-have-a-bad-day-if-t4861.htm Outspoken You might have a bad day if: 1) You woke up in a strange place. 2) Your new diet doesn't seem to be working. 3) You pulled a muscle while trying to exercise. 4) Your new hat looked better on you at the store. 5) You keep losing things. 6) You feel like you're in the wrong place at the wrong time. 7) The boss chewed you out at work. You got caught in the rain at lunchtime. 9) You feel trapped somehow. 10) ... The Laugh Box Tue, 26 Feb 2008 23:18:09 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/you-might-have-a-bad-day-if-t4861.htm#6365 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/you-might-have-a-bad-day-if-t4861.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-dam-t2984.htm Outspoken The Dam This is an actual letter sent to a man named Ryan DeVries regarding a pond on his property. It was sent by the Pennsylvania Department of Environmental Quality, State of Pennsylvania . This guy's response is hilarious, but read the State's letter before you get to the response letter. SUBJECT: DEQ File No.97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec. 20; Lycoming County Dear Mr. DeVries: It has come to the attention of the Department of Environmental Quality that there ... The Laugh Box Fri, 28 Dec 2007 04:28:44 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-dam-t2984.htm#4290 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/the-dam-t2984.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/redneck-jokes-t2981.htm Sharon You're a redneck if... -You have more fingers than you do teeth -You cut your grass and find a car -You consider Denny's a Fancy Resturant -Your best Suit contains more than 5 colors -Your age is higher than your I.Q. -Your favorite pickup line is "Does this look infected to you?" -You ask your wife wheather the spot on your neck is a boil or a mole and she replies "Its a gummy bear." -You have a family reunion and everyone in town shows up. -You say "Watch ... The Laugh Box Thu, 27 Dec 2007 22:32:54 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/redneck-jokes-t2981.htm#4274 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/redneck-jokes-t2981.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/south-park-christmas-rated-pg-13-t2863.htm Outspoken Mr. Mackey: (Mmkay?) "Carol of the Bells": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FtBsKbKqYb4 The Laugh Box Sat, 22 Dec 2007 18:27:33 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/south-park-christmas-rated-pg-13-t2863.htm#4118 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/south-park-christmas-rated-pg-13-t2863.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/cars-t2763.htm Sharon Car Humor And Jokes "It doesn't matter how much you paid for the car, they all look the same after the wreck." From a wise dad. Q: How many car salesment does it take to change a light bulb? A: I'm going to work this out on my calculator, and I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. ACURA Always Catching Up, Rarely Ahead Asia's Curse Upon Rural America A Car Usually Rarely Appreciates AMC Always Made Crap Autos May Combust AUDI Accelerates Under Demonic Influence Always ... The Laugh Box Wed, 19 Dec 2007 19:37:27 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/cars-t2763.htm#4008 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/cars-t2763.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/short-stories-of-the-truly-moronic-t2761.htm Sharon SHORT STORIES OF THE TRULY MORONIC Will the real dummy please stand up? AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership." He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence. <hr width="90%" noShade SIZE=2> With a little help from our friends! Police in Oakland, California spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his ... The Laugh Box Wed, 19 Dec 2007 16:27:36 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/short-stories-of-the-truly-moronic-t2761.htm#4006 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/short-stories-of-the-truly-moronic-t2761.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/random-thoughts-t2680.htm Minx If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs? Shouldn't they be wearing night gowns? If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with. When cheese gets it's ... The Laugh Box Tue, 18 Dec 2007 01:02:37 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/random-thoughts-t2680.htm#3907 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/random-thoughts-t2680.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/medicating-your-cat-t2679.htm Minx How To Give A Cat A Pill 1. Grasp cat firmly in your arms. Cradle its head on your elbow, just as if you were giving a baby a bottle. Coo confidently, "That's a nice kitty." Drop pill into its mouth. 2. Retrieve cat from top of lamp and pill from under sofa. 3. Follow same procedure as in #1, but hold cat's front paws down with left hand and back paws down with elbow of right arm. Poke pill into its mouth with right forefinger. 4. Retrieve cat from under bed. Get new ... The Laugh Box Mon, 17 Dec 2007 21:28:03 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/medicating-your-cat-t2679.htm#3902 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/medicating-your-cat-t2679.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/why-t2641.htm Minx Why? Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive? Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds? Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii? Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes? Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there? If you are going to shoot a mime, do you need a silencer ? Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations? How ... The Laugh Box Sun, 16 Dec 2007 21:22:04 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/why-t2641.htm#3853 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/why-t2641.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/signs-t2640.htm Minx Actual Signs In the front yard of a funeral home, "Drive carefully, we'll wait." On an electrician's truck, "Let us remove your shorts." Outside a radiator repair shop, "Best place in town to take a leak." On a maternity room door, "Push, Push, Push." On a front door, "Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog." At an optometrist's office, "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come ... The Laugh Box Sun, 16 Dec 2007 21:20:40 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/signs-t2640.htm#3852 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/signs-t2640.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/famous-women-quotes-t2639.htm Minx Famous Women Quotes "You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. "[Erica Jong] "I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog." [Wendy Liebman] "Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth." [Erma Bombeck] "I'm not going to vacuum 'till Sears makes one you can ride on." [Roseanne Barr] "I think - therefore I'm single." [Lizz Winstead] ... The Laugh Box Sun, 16 Dec 2007 21:05:42 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/famous-women-quotes-t2639.htm#3851 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/famous-women-quotes-t2639.htm http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/random-laws-of-physics-for-cats-t2638.htm Minx Random Laws of Physics for Cats Law of Cat Inertia A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force - such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse. Law of Cat Sleeping All cats must sleep with people whenever possible, in a position as uncomfortable for the people involved as is possible for the cat. Law of Dinner Table Attendance Cats must attend all meals when anything good is served. Law of Rug Configuration ... The Laugh Box Sun, 16 Dec 2007 21:02:41 GMT http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/random-laws-of-physics-for-cats-t2638.htm#3850 http://kennebecvalleypodium.forumotion.com/the-laugh-box-f17/random-laws-of-physics-for-cats-t2638.htm